Halloween, if you hadn’t noticed, was Sandi‘s favorite holiday.

Last Halloween, there was a large gathering of friends and ministers at our apartment to give Sandi a grand Samhain ritual as a kind of a going-away present. Singing & chanting, with everyone gathered around her bed. It was lovely.

She died almost exactly seven days later.

She held on as long as she could, fighting constant pain and discomfort. She didn’t complain, but just nodded when i asked her if it was time for more pain relief.

We both did our best; that’s what any marriage boils down to. It was enough.

If you ever help someone fight their final battle, right to their last breath, it may change your outlook on life.

Even though i’m ok with being alone, life is never going to be the same again.