I go back-and-forth in thinking, am I doing better? Am I better off? No easy answers.

I need a project to work on. Whether it’s computer stuff, or…. I don’t know anything else except for computer stuff. I haven’t even been doing my programming stuff for a while, but I could start that back up again.

I’m going to try an app where you read other people’s little bits of writing and stories or something and i’ll see if i can get some inspiration from that. I have three days to try the app for free and i’ll see if it’s worth continuing. I’m trying not to be skeptical.

I guess i don’t have much faith in people, especially people i don’t know. Why should i? I should be more specific — faith that you’re going to have something interesting to say.

Wow, i really am a misanthrope, aren’t i.

So i tried the new app, Sincerely. It’s like an emotional ponzi scheme, with people sharing random stuff, and you can respond if you want. Brings out the misanthrope in me, is what it does.

“It probably won’t get better. Life kinda sucks; get used to it. Work will probably be unfulfilling. You might get lucky with a romantic relationship, but it might not last. But try anyway, because there’s not much else to do in life.”

Maybe i don’t need it. Brings out the worst in me.

“There’s no character limit — no limits to how you can build (or destroy) character.
Life is essentially meaningless; don’t beat yourself up over not finding meaning. Nothing matters. That’s what life is about. It’s all interpretation.
Don’t sweat it.”

I do not think people will like that.

All right; that is enough for tonight.

[OK, one more:

People on this app don’t actually say much. Me included. Brings out the misanthrope in me, reading other people’s bits. Mostly i’m tempted to write sarcastic things in response. Most of the letters i’ve read so far are pretty boring.

No inspiration yet.

Life is boring, if you hadn’t noticed.

How do you pass the time? (I mean, legally.)

Does humor help? A little. Sometimes.

Learn to laugh at life, i guess. It’s not that important. As long as you don’t take it too seriously. Don’t take anything seriously; it’s not worth it.

Blah, blah, blah.

Let’s see what happens.

]